You can't see me

I just don't get it.

"Who is going to ask us? They will take it out of our salaries and that's it," said Nagina, a mother of three who spoke to Reuters on condition of anonymity.

Just an ordinary story bout the

way things go. Just out and about this week, been just getting my hair in the wind. Not riding a motorcycle, but traveling around with the new friends and enjoying the company AND the music!

Mobluz got the room way close to done this weekend - I hepped! It was so fun to see Bitsy fussing with making the bed and deciding where things went. Mo was just grinning. She has a nice place to be where she is watched over well and it made my heart run over to see the love in it.

I enjoyed one night of my own private, live music until way to late to go home. I have to get a camp bed for traveling, that recliner is viscious!

Met some more of the neighbors, Bitsy's dad cooked for everyone two days running. Fine cook and I later found out, fine singer and good guitiarist. Jamming started happening and even Bitsy started singing on the mic! While she's young and a little stiff her voice has promise and it was just a riot to hear her going at Tom Petty with Mo.

I took one turn and then had to finally call it a weekend and head for the house. I might make it to a Big City jam tonight.

Hey everyone, LOOK!

I'm getting a life!

Throw ya in jail for havin too much fun!

Wow! I had so much fun I almost feel like I have a real life again instead of just reporting for duty because I'm still here. It's so good to have some zing in my spirit again!

I got my deliveries made. Gloomy Guy has some furniture and someone got a bike. The rest of my deliveries were just me being available for fun. They worked!

My Thursday jam session at Mobluz's turned into a Harley head gasket replacement class. One of his friends blew it out right nearby and ended up at his place. MoBluz helped with chili and ribs.

I didn't have to drive so I got a little schnapps to enjoy the sudden party with when I helped by making the beer run. I need to remember to be easy on the black label stuff! Woohoo! I haven't gotten tipsy in a long time. It was fun. Not over done, but silly, and I liked it. The bike was up and running before midnight. The wrench guy was impressive.

I fought with the auto upright recliner all night. I think I won. I woke up so I must have been asleep at some point! Mobluz had to work. I, scamp that I am, didn't. I spent the day drooling over motorcycles for sale and looking for things for the girl I guess I will call Bitsy. She's just a tiny thing. I didn't score but I lined up a few things.

After MoBluz went to work I hit a coffee shop with the laptop and sat outside in the woods nearby. It was beautiful and the violets were all out like a lush carpet. I yard sale searched for a small bed and failed. I enjoyed the day. I got the oil changed in the truck. I met another widow and we talked meaningfully. I wandered around a local flea market. It was thin this early in the season but it was nice that it was there.

The day was good. The night was good. I wandered off home after visiting with MoBluz and Bitsy after he got out of work. It was a pleasant time. The room is coming along nicely. I met one of his daughters over the weekend, too. It's been very nice, making new friends.

We met up at jam on Saturday. That was fun! We had done at least a little work on a couple of tunes and the people there were quick enough studies that they picked them right up. Everyone had one good song in them and we knocked off a couple that just rocked. I love it when that happens! It was good to see them all.

After MoBluz and I got a snack we headed out to meet my cousins that don't live too far north of there. I haven't seen them in some time. Everyone hit it off ok and then I had to fly for a hot Tunk game I was booked for two weeks in advance. My Northern friend and his family had a wonderful feed on and they are fun card players. For the buck or two I lost it was a big return on the investment just to laugh and joke with them.

Sunday I checked out a new church. It was wonderful, too. I needed the fellowship, joy and encouragement I found there. The music was awesome. They are my favorite kind of church. I call it a "working church". They aren't just sitting there paying off the new roof. There is a men's shelter, a food pantry, a household needs and clothing closet, too. I'm thinkin' I'm in....have to see what comes next.

I spent the rest of Sunday alone and writing until the neighbor girl, Singer, showed up. Haven't seen her since last summer when I went to her grandfather's bday country jam. We had a very good talk and learned her a new song. So there was even more music on Sunday.

This morning the #1son called to inform me that the next grand is a boy, his first. That's one of each gender and he says that's it. Blue jeans in size "0" coming soon.

Eldest Daughter's boy friend was in a bicycle wreck. Broken clavical, surgury coming. She was right there for him and they are doing ok.

Scooter Girl will be making a trip to visit soon and taking home some more of the things I am shedding. She the the family are doing fine.

Best Girl and her crew covered me so I could runn oft this weekend, shampooed the living room and we got a good talk in on Friday night. She is my hero!

Mom is planning a Florida run soon. Sis has a new baby mini horse. Shy Girl and her partner have had a lot of things coming right for them. Gloomy Guy got his apartment, Northern Man's back injury is mostly under control, Jeanette and her crew are unaccounted for, phones aren't working. My friend that lost her husband is hanging in there. The one I am missing good news for will be along when he gets here.

The bills are current, the bank book isn't zeroed and I get paid Thursday, the truck is running great and I have had fun a whole week.

Life is good right now. I am aware that it is a blessing. I am still lonely. The 20th was a special anniversary for the mate and I that always snags my heart, and there was a sadness in it, but I am smiling today.

Love them while you have them, folks. Enjoy it while you have it. Do it now and see me later!

Walk with the animals

Getting back to nature, my nature.

I'm doin' it! I'm running away from home! I haven't run away from home since August last year.

I got to meet the little girl who is getting the special help from Moblu on the phone last night. I had left some things for her and he gave them to her so I could hear how she liked them. She liked them a lot, a couple squeels worth. That was fun.

We are jammin later tonight. In the meantime I have some things I thought up I want to do and I am gonna go do them!

I have things to take where they go that isn't where they are. I'm going to head out to see how much I can get delivered today for fun.

So all of you have a great weekend. I took tomorrow off and I am leaving early today.

There! NOW I'm being myself! I'm going off to do what feels good. (I'm not really being bad though, I have a vacation day to burn!)

See ya all Monday, if I make it through!

I've got the music in me

Monday I was whupped. I made it in to work and thru work on three hours sleep and, once again, recalled that I am not twenty something anymore. I went home thinking I would crash early but got into a long and interesting phone conversation with Moblu, one of the guitiar players I met Saturday. We kept me up until eleven....it was more fun than sleeping!

I had a good day at work and went home to prep for bible study. Only I didn't. It's a good thing they all know their way around my kitchen. Sis was cooking and came in to find me still on the phone. I called for a Gloomy Guy report. My friend got his apartment! That was good news! He wasn't going to make it to bible study but I will probably see him Thursday to deliver some furniture for him. That's two on the three item list he needed, vehicle, place, now we have to pray up some work for him. I was glad to have good news to share with everyone.

Then Shy Girl rang me up and she was coming over, too! She and her mate had a new study group and we hadn't seen her for awhile. She had really good news for us on their situation and I was just tickled for them.

My new pal, Moblu, had told me of a project for a little girl next door to him that I had really felt moved to help with. When we all got settled down for dinner Mom was celebrating how well things were going for her. I asked if she had any tithe money left for the week. She faltered on that one and asked how much. I gave her a number and she maybe she could dig it up. Just then Shy Girl came in. I got up to greet her and, while she hugged me, she slipped me a tithe.

It was the amount I asked for and gas money enough for two trips where it had to be taken! I love being a distribution point.

Later I told Mom never mind, I had what I needed. We had a good study time after all the good news at dinner and I got them out the door, grabbed my electric guitiar, packed up the goodies I had to share and the pocketed the tithe and booked.

It was so much fun to have somewhere to go and someone to see that was glad to see me coming! I got my stuff to the door and was welcomed after the volumn dropped enough that my knock could be heard.

Moblu was surprised by the bag of goodies and resources for his project. I told him of how they came to me that night. I don't really know what he thought of it all but we left it lay and went on to teaching me to play back up on his new song. That was FUN! It's a great tune with lyrics I can totally feel are real. Maybe next time the bass player will be there.

I love being able to "poof" good things for people who care about others. It's not me doing it, I just get the delivery made.

I know it's "just not done". Meet person, give to person what you see is needed. There's supposed to be a time thing in there for getting accquainted. But the things I saw as needed for him to help the little girl came to me. I just passed them on. I won't wait for later. I never know how far away that is. I could have bought the farm Sunday night on the way home. I do it now.

He was still a little tense later as we said good bye but we were trying some new things and neither of us is quite sure where it's going. We really enjoy each other's company and the music we can share between us. It was a great time. I got out of there just a little after tomorrow arrived. I got home in time to get enough rest for today.

It sure beat sitting home alone! We are maybe doing the jam on Saturday together. I'm looking forward again. Not back. I even whistled yesterday.

It feels like I have made a friend I can be there for and who will be there for me. I have some of them and treasure them but this one is standing where I am, we have hurts in common. It comes out in the music for both of us so the "making friends" part whooshed by a little quickly. We are already to the having fun part.

I so needed a friend to play with. This has been a great time. And it was all because I met another person who had a need I could meet, taking the items I had for his auction. This was a fun story to share. I so needed to have some fun.

Thanks for listening.

if you don't stop driving that hot rod Lincoln

It was a strange weekend with MUCH music and fun that neared it's end with a drive home about 4:30 am. I was coming into the first of the last two curves before home when I just said to my self, "It's, for crying out loud, 4 in the morning and I am going to be BAD! I'm taking this (poorly banked and almost dangerous) curve on the wrong side of the road - fast and low!"

I'm such an outlaw! Sometimes, when I have been so good it hurts, I just have to be bad to feel human again. I thought this was one of those times.

I dropped down to the left, where the banking is good and edged the pedal down to speed up. Yup I was fast AND bad!

At least, I thought I was being bad....

Then, to my right, in the proper lane - where I should have been - I saw the big (emphasis on big!) carcass of the poor deer that didn't make it across the road. I would have hit it with just my left tire doing 45 (the posted speed) just past dead center of the curve.

I don't even want to do the math on it. I think it ends up with trees and ditches and upside down, like in the movies when they launch just two tires on the same side of a car.....

So I thought I was yearning to be bad but maybe I had just heard an angel whisper to me. It was wrong to be in that lane by our rules. Breaking them kept me here again.

I give up. Coincidence is going OUT of my vocabulary. When even being bad is good who's to say what's bad or good? I can't anymore.

You figure it out, let me know.... But I made it home safe with a smile on my face and watched for a car pulled over that overheated. I saw it and said a prayer for them, they were already rescued.

Life just gets too strange sometimes even for me.

*****************************
Friday night excitement was doing laundry and crashing early. Saturday I wrote and read, then used those clean clothes to go to jam session. Yay! Fun was had by all. I left and didn't want to go home yet so I bought a book at the good will and took me out for lupper or sunch.

While I was there I met a couple that were talking about a bike they were rebuilding. We got to talking and he did guitairs, too. I got mine out for him to look at. We did a couple tunes. No one kicked us out. He told me of a fund raiser the next day. I offered some auction items. They accepted. I went home with a book to read and a plan for the next day.

After Sunday morning study I cleaned up and packed to roll north. I got there and hauled my stuff in. The one person I knew from the day before saw me coming and greeted me. I was welcomed. Then I found two of the Saturday Jam men there. I wacked 'em good for not telling me there was a party, then gave them greeting hugs and sat with them.

There were five or six others at the two tables. They were all there to play. We got accquainted as best we could over the music we really wanted to listen to. It was nice. The two I knew left, but by then I was comfortable with the others.

I watched the music and heard the songs others wrote that made me laugh or smile. I sang one with the guys I had been sitting with and we had fun with it. I made new friends and heard a song the touched me deeply. I played some blues while the gang tore down and packed with the man who invited me.

It was just fun. I needed that. Then I helped haul equipment in my truck and played some more with them when we got it all set back up at the house. Then I realized it was almost four of the clock. I had to get my butt home to be to work. I hate leaving when I'm having fun!

Then I didn't hit the deer or the carcass and lived to enjoy the memory of a good time had by all.

Thought I'd share it with you. Have some fun, ya'll! Later might be unavailable to you.

Children, I'm not kidding, don't wait for the time to be right, if you need to do something

Do it NOW!

Row, row, row your boat!

I just loved this article today. They've built a ship of popsicle sticks and are sailing where the Vikings have been.

I looked for it and found the website. You really should check it out. The inspiration is uplifting.

Sunday morning coming down

I woke on Sunday feeling strange and low. I dealt with it as I made coffee and got moving. Sort of. I don't know how much longer I will have to deal with hormones but I'm starting to think I'm kinda old for this. I sat and wrote, read and prayed, as I do every Sunday. Then I went out to play. It was too nice to stay inside.

The #1son called in the afternoon about a glitch with his bike. Funny, it wouldn't start. I talked him through jumping it and heard it running. He got the first ride to the gas station to air it up and fill the tank. He offered me the next. I took him up on it.

It had been a fine day and I had been burning off the ditch. The wind got a little crazy and I had to do some fancy stepping to keep things where one person could handle it. That was what I was doing when the boy called. I put the fire well out, got dressed to ride and hit the road.

I took "old blue" through the curves and out to the flats to run her up and blow her out. That was fun! I came up on two other riders and passed a van to join them. That was fun, too. When we got to town they were going right and I was going left. We lined up at the light, smiled and waved and rode off. I went where I was headed, took care of business, left and headed back for the boy's house before it got too dark and cold.

As I went through town again I saw another biker or two. One was on a Harley of tourquoise, all the rest that day were black bikes. I was the only blue one. Cool!

I got back just as the sun was setting. I went in to visit with the grand and DIL. I had brought a peacock feather to the little one. At three years old she found it the perfect magic wand and tickle stick. She's really fun.

I headed home, contemplating the weekend. It was good. I rode behind a man and I rode on my own. I rode with other bikes. I enjoyed it all.

I slept well from the fresh air and exercise. Monday wasn't bad. I have made it to Friday again.

head out on the highway

Last Saturday I was driving from where I live to the next city north and west of me. I was dressed to ride and had my helmet and gloves right beside me. I was hoping to find a bike for sale, just right for me, that I could get a test ride on. A day that sweet, sunny and warm just screamed "RIDE!!!" to me.

I never saw even one. I got to jam session and there was a bike - PARKED!. Arrrrggghh! Someone had a bike and instead of riding was sitting inside in the dark Inn where we meet.

As I was going in the rider was on his way out. I made bold to speak to him just what my heart desired. I asked if he'd give me a ride and added I had the helmet and gloves in the truck.

The young man smiled and said, "Yes". I almost hurt myself dragging the guitiar over to leave it under the watchful eyes of my friends. I as smiling big as I told them I would be right back and left. They're my friends, they smiled at me as I turned to go, glad to see me with a real smile on my face. It showed from them It's so nice to have friends.

It's so nice to meet new friends, too. The nice young man and I had quite a conversation while he granted me a ride. The V-Star was a little small looking but it had plenty of power. He ran me out to a curvy road and I said, if you're going slow on my account, put your foot in it! He laughed and said he wondered if he was going too fast for an old lady. I asked him if he'd like to sit on the back and I'd show him how it was done! We laughed. He sped up some. The curves were too tight to get real rowdy on.

We have names and thoughts and places exchanged to keep in touch because we found we were both believers. He's a walking miracle. His story is not mine to tell but it was good for me to hear. I think we will see each other again. He dropped me off but came back later to introduce me to his fiance. They are gentle eyed people with smiles and I wished them all the best. I thanked the girl for sharing her seat, she hasn't ridden enough to know it was a special treat. She will though, I think.

Then the music was good and the company fine. The day was too beautiful to ignore. I don't have a bike of my own yet, but I have a truck. I drove all over. I was going to hear a friend's band play later, over in River City. I took the long way over there, through beautiful roads on a fine spring day.

I decided I needed a clean shirt and went shopping for one to wear. I forgot (again) how much I don't enjoy shopping for clothes. I got one, finally, but I was toasted in my head.

It's been years since I lived out of public bathrooms for daily hygine. It was kind of fun to change and clean up there and find I still had the skills I needed. I came out feeling pretty.

The band was good, the lead player is great, the singing fun but they are loud, old r & r. I left about midnight. My ears were sore. My throat was sore from talking over and through them with the friends I hadn't seen since the last time I went to hear them.

It was a good day and I was glad to have it. Never did find a bike for sale on any road I traveled.

Get your motor runnin'

I'm working on my first warm cup of coffee. I had one and a piece of yesterday's stash from the carafe to hold me until the fresh was made. The sun is up but I was freezing cold. I checked the heat. I had it down to 55. I forgot I left the windows open to air the other day.

Brrrr...I said, I want a shower soon. I cranked it up to 64 and then I had to laugh. The weather says it's supposed to be 60 out today and I was thinking of borrowing back the bike I gave the son to get a ride in on such a warm day!

People sure are weird, huh? Cold in jamas at 55, too cold to shower, but thinking of getting the bike out for a ride in just five more degrees. I guess I better think it through. I can dress for the weather and the ride would be wonderful.

I have so missed the spring routines of starting the bike and checking it over on the days not quite warm enough to ride on. Waiting for the first good rain to get the salt off the roads and seeing it go by this week left me missing my bike and a friend to share the anticipation with, I almost even missed shining the chrome after it's dusty winter in the garage. Almost!

As the sun continues to rise and warm the day I'm going to have a problem. Can I still get a guitiar on the back and make it to jam session? I don't know but I am thinking I might try it.

Even if I don't borrow back the bike that was mine once I have been drooling over the ones for sale on the side of the road. If the feds come through with the promised bonus I'm afraid I won't be practical at all. Even with the medical bills haunting me and honor bound as I feel to try to meet them I think I have to have a bike the way some people have to have shoes.

I like to wander but I'd wear out my feet walking those miles I want to cover. I don't like to waste gas someone else might need and at the prices the truck is not the best way to get around. I can get my overnighter and the laptop, a camera and the guitar on a bike with good saddle bags if I pack carefully. There might even be room for road tools, a book and a way to make coffee.....whoops. Ok, maybe a small trailer, too. Then the camping stuff will fit. If I am going to dream I may as well make it easier. A bit bigger bike and an easy set up pop up camper would get it all mobile with me.

Anybody want a barn cat? I think I have places for the dogs....

It's spring today for me and I'm dreaming but summer isn't gone yet. It might happen. So don't be surprised if I start writing with a southern drawl.

I'm planning on going to hear a friend's band tonight three towns over. It's just to fill the chairs for them. I expect it will be fun, of a sort. I don't know if I will make jam or not, or snatch the bike or not, or just lay out in the sun today and think.

Some time I'll let you know what happened next. Thanks for dropping in.

You look like a monkey annnnd

I missed my blog's third birthday. No surprise, I miss my kid's birthdays. I went back to look a little and found this at the end of my second post. I liked it then and I like it now so you are getting a re- run from three years ago. It's slightly modified, of course. Can't keep my hands off.

Love is grown, like a climbing rose.

You start by digging up the dirt. (learn about each other)
Make a deep, wide and messy hole. (Honesty, even the bad stuff)
Fill in the first layer of drainage with gravel or small rocks - which hurt to find and are a pain to gather up (the hurtful, getting accquainted experiences).
Throw them deep in the bottom. (forget them)
Add sand (the sweet little things) to fill in the gaps.
Let the water (life) filter down slowly.
Put in a good soil mix composed of rotted leaves,(history) composted bullshit (crap to be ignored) and good topsoil (Your love for each other).
Build this into a small mound at the bottom of the hole, for supporting the roots (experience).

THEN you take the plunge. (Make the commitment)
Put the plant in the hole, spreading the roots over the mound carefully. (deep seated and secure roots support the weight of the plate to be.)
Water it well (love each other) and tuck it in with clean soil ( be NICE and gentle) so the roots aren't exposed to air.
The mystery begins.
You wait - (time passes) for the first leaf, the first new branch, the first bud, celebrating each as a sign your love lives.

When you find the first thorn, a sign that the plant lives and can protect itself. (learning to live together) you move your fingers and find another!(More learning)
Tie it carefully to the supports you want it to climb. (family, God, friends, all support a pair)
Work through it until you learn how to place your fingers safely. (Experience, only gained by errors)
Now you can bend the well supported branch closer to appreciate the aroma of the blossoms. (true love - when you have it NOTICE, Enjoy it, encourage it - now, not later.)
For years and years you will enjoy just that one plant that you worked for and bled on as it produces thousands of roses. (all the love in your days).