Love is all you need

Blogger kept eating this post, sorry it took so long. May the New Year bring you love, joy and contentment in your life!

Christmas Day was a dreary grey with rain drips, more than fog, less than rain, dropping on everyone. It was a lovely day to sleep in, wake to coffee and a loving mate, have a nice hot breakfast and play with our presents.

All the visiting was done, the mate was too sick to go anywhere anyway. We had no commitments and no regrets. The kids were all scheduled for "next year" visits except for his eldest who was stopping in later that day just to pick up a movie and book we had borrowed. Stress level was zero and keeping the mate warm and resting was the order of the day.

We did our things with the computers, got email, ect., then later we watched our Christmas Movies. I installed my new screensaver, the 3D aquarium and played some ZELDA!!!! It was a lovely, restful day. I did things on Indian time and enjoyed being home with the mate.

I browned and roasted a chuck roast in coffee, worchester and spices, adding whole red potatoes later and the mate added a salad to the menu. I smashed the potatoes and made gravy for the mate, added cheese to mine and we enjoyed a lovely dinner.

The cards I found for the cash gifts had a place on the front to stick a little picture so I went back and found photos of the grands 3 or 4 years back and stuck on them, and for the kids, too. They got as much fun out of seeing how little they were as they did out of the money.

All in all a lovely Christmas. Wishing the same happened for all of you.

Oh, and I got earring to match my birthday ring, the screen saver, a hat gloves and scarf from mates Eldest, a Shreck2 tree ornament from the Mom, some cash from a relative, cookies from the sis, fruit from the Florida sis, a card from the loser sis and have more christmas to do with people further away yet.

The mate got new moccasins, two new movies, Pay per view wrestling from his eldest and a dinner for the 8th of Jan, a fishing cat tree ornament, some money from a relative, a call from his dad, a card from his little brother and stocking treats for both of us were left by santa.

So what was my favorite gift this Christmas, what meant the most to me about the holiday season? I'll tell you.

It was the smile and hug from step Grama when I showed up to visit for awhile and the smile from step Grampa when I handed him his double chocolate truffles.

It was the cheer rendered to me in love by the neices and nephews as I walked in the door to make cookies with them and the laughter and playtime we all shared.

The look on the mate's face when he saw he had perfectly matched my ring with the earrings he gave me and the hug and kiss he gave me to go with them. The joy in our loving that night.

Listening to the 2nd grand boy say, "Boy I was LITTLE back then!" when he saw the photo I had printed out and stuck on his card.


It was watching the grand girl hug her new baby doll I got for her and the the Eldest son showing her how to hold it. The hug I got from the DIL and the smiles from her and the boy as they watched the one year old girl eat cake.

The laughs at the the boy girl gifts as we opened them. No one got a can opener this year. The best gift wat the one someone made.

The loving pride on Mom's face as she watched 4 generations playing with the toy castle in her living room.

And the laugh she blessed us with as the nephew, saying the spirit of step Dad made him buy her a new appliance to replace the perfectly good one she already had and gifting her with an electric tea kettle. She has a perfectly good little kettle she uses on an electric stove, but step dad would have liked the "techier" plug in one and got it for her. It sets on the shelf next to the juicer and the popcorn popper with his other gifts to her.

The loving thoughtfulness of the nephew and NIL for thinking of her and remembering their step Grampa whom we lost 3 years ago on Christmas warmed my heart. The warmth of hearing the other NIL say my hair looked pretty up.

Probably the most fun for me was actually being able to get around without crutches or a walker this year, even if I couldn't talk. I appreciated not needing 6 people to clear the way for me.

I even got some gifts from my blogging pals. Someone forgave and accepted something very difficult for him to deal with and made his own Christmas one of smiles and joy for his family. And a note saying thanks for the smiles this year from another. Thank you all for those happy thoughts.

The very best present didn't come in a box, or a bag, wasn't wrapped. I was just sitting there and it fell in my lap. I was writing on my machine one night and realized that I was still happy and content with the mate and our life and that I had NO worries. The house was solid, the bills up to day, the cars are running, the kids and grands and folks are all ok, and the pets are pretty good for their years.

Yes, there were things I would change if I could, like the limited cash flow we are dealing with and maybe even hitting the lottery so we could have that place on 100 acres with a pond or creek and time and health to hunt it, roam and fish it. Then give each of the kids and grands ten acres when we pass on.

But then I thanked the Cosmic all and God that I was wise enough to notice and smart enough to know how rare a gift I had been given, the love and respect of my family and friends, quiet happiness, health, contentment and no worries. And it has lasted for several days now.

It brings tears to my eyes when I think of all the people who will never have even a moment like this in their lives. I am even sadder when I contemplate how many may never notice when they have a time like this because they are always so in need of something to complain about that they miss it.

For me this holiday is about sharing the love that was given freely to us all with those we love and those in need of some loving kindness. It was the love expressed to my and from me to others - the hugs, the smiles, the laughter and the tears over those we miss still that will be remembered, not the gifts.

If you love someone, say so today and count your blessings. Merry Christmas.

Brown paper packages, tied up with string

...actually are one of my favorite things. This time of year, for my family, Grama's Christmas Cut Outs are another favorite for many of us. These are a soft, fat sugar cookie iced hot to get a glazed effect with the icing. Then we add decorations with colored icing or "stuff", like sprinkles, to match the holiday.

We make them for Christmas, I make them for Valentine's Day and Easter, too. They are yummy and stay soft in a covered container for days and days! The problem with this cookie is that they HAVE TO be iced while warm or the icing is "wrong". As my kids and then my grands got older I have run out of helpers and discovered that these take at least two, and preferably 3, people to make right.

It is impossible to pull 18 cookies out and ice them in the eight minutes before the next batch comes out. If you let the dough get warm it takes more flour, losing the "lightness" of the cookie. I had all the stuff to make at least two batches in the cupboards. With this flu and no helpers, that's where it stayed. I didn't have the energy or the interest to bake them alone.

It's Saturday - Christmas Eve - I went to step Grama's Christmas Open house in the early afternoon. I took things to drop off with the Mom for her last minute gifts and a gift for the Grand folks. They love candy and are easy to shop for!

There were the requisite treats and munchies there to enjoy, a yorkie dog to watch and a black cat to pet. The Lions actually lucked into winning a game, thanks to a touchdown by the defense, and all was right with the world.

While we were chatting my sister said she was baking cookies when she got home. She had made three batches of the Cut Outs and had the kids and grands home to help her. That got me all "I wanna make cookies, too!" when I heard she had the extra hands to help. She said I was more than welcome to join them.

So after making my polites to everyone I scooted out the door and home to get my stuff and the recipe for Aunt A's chocolate chip cookies and a couple extra bags of chips to trade for some cut outs for us. I also switched trucks at home and grabbed the mate's little 4WD to make the trip.

While we have had enough snow for a white Christmas for Christmas Eve we had rain and temps in the 30's. It looked like February, with melted snow drifts, dripping eaves and trees, and half thawed icy gravel roads challanging the best vehicles to stay on them. And the sis lives even further into the sticks than I do. I made it safely to the road they live on, bounced and slid across the washboards in the swampy spots, made the driveway and then got all the way down the drive without getting stuck. I was pretty proud of the little red truck, I never used the 4WD.

When I dragged in the door with my bags of baking supplies there was a little cheer from the neices and nephews, "Aunt Val!", that warmed my heart. I love those kids!

The sis was making dinner and I started my batch of drop cookies while they ate. The timing was great. I was ready to bake while they cleared the table for cookie cutting and decorating. Once mine were run thru I discover none of them likes black walnuts, or some of them don't like raisins, in their chocolate chip cookies.....well POOP! So I ended up taking all of them all home with me. I knew Mom would like them. (Later I find out the mate doesn't like the black walnuts in cookies, either.) We bagged them up and got them out of the way then started the cut out relay races.

The littlest grands and the kids cut out the cookies and put them on baking sheets, the neice baked and timed the cookies, the sis and I put the icing on them. Three hours we stood and decorated cookies of many shapes and sizes. Near the end I cut out some little tiny ginger bread men that baked up about an inch tall. The little guys liked them. We were sticky clear to the elbows with spots of pink and yellow on our shirts, our backs aching and our feet tired when we finally finished. The cookies were very festive looking! To torment yourself click on the picture to download the wallpaper file. It's 2 meg, it takes time to load.




I loaded a couple plates with about a dozen for the mate and I then put them with the bagged up cookies and collapsed in a chair for a minute before I left for home. The kids had cleared the table and got out the poker table top one of the boys made with his Dad. As I was sitting there we played a few hands of "Hold 'Em".

The Dad had folded one hand with a pair of jacks and discovered we had all played on little pairs or nothing with Ace high and got all disgusted! It was funny! "What are you doing bidding up a pair of 5's!" he asked me.

"Bluffing, the same as the neice was!" I retorted. "And if I'd had jacks I would have bet black chips!" He "gggrrrrrr'ed" and started dealing the next hand while we all laughed at him. I bet he stayed in the rest of the hands that night! But I dropped out as the last nephew and niece in law arrived with their little girl.

When you have ice on the lakes and snow in the drifts but it's 35 degrees out you get fog. What I call "wall fog". As in "You won't know it's a wall till you hit it." You can't see the road more than ten feet ahead of the car, you can't see traffic until it's in your face and if you can FIND the white or yellow lines, you can't tell they curve until you are IN the curve.

Forget reflectors, forget tail lights, you are driving on instinct. I got the flashlight out of my pocket, figured out the lights and heater on the red truck, then called the mate while it warmed up some. I let him know I was leaving, put the phone down to charge up, engaged the 4WD and headed for the house. Slowly. Carefully.

There are no markings on the drive or the road back to the main road. You can't even see the signs until you are almost past them. I made it to the corner on the first paved road, took the truck out of 4W, waited for three cars to get by me and pulled out slowly. I went about 35 mph most of the way home.

I was surprised how well I knew where I was inspite of the fog. I never missed a turn or a curve. And, luckily, the critters were busy staying dry, not leaping into my path in the dark. I got home, let the cat in with me and put the treats out for the mate to try then curled up with him on the couch and watched a movie. We had a quiet evening and then to bed, before Santa came and caught us still up!

Snowflakes that melt on my nose and eyelashes...

...were falling this morning - great, fat, wet ones. I had today off so the Mate and I went shopping for the stocking stuffers and such that we still needed for the holiday.

We finished two pots of coffee, got showered and dressed in our own good time and then headed out to the "real" world.

After hitting the Good Will (cards for money, 4 books) and Walplace (movies, screen saver, shiney things, treats for stockings), both full of procrastinators, we were freaked right out and wired.

He took us to a sit down restaurant for an early dinner. It was just the ticket! Filled with hot food and refreshed by coffee we continued to the last store with a gift card to spend. We had made a list of the last items while we ate (dinner items, milk, birdseed) and got in and out of there like a flash, then ran for home!

Back in our snug harbor we treated the menagerie to holiday snacks with our leftovers from our meals. I made some little photos for the "frame" on the front of each card, then we wrote cards, stuffed them with money for the grands and wrapped gifts.

We enjoyed the original movie of "The Christmas Carol" together later that evening. We both feel that it is the best acted of all the versions. Mate is still sick with the flu I had (have still) and we wrapped it up early. Plus we were wiped out from shopping. I still woke up after an hour or so and blogged this.

Merry Christmas to all!

Let me whisper in your ear,

Because I still can't speak out loud. The good news is today is the first day the rest of me seems to be normal. I am almost drug free! I am superstitious about giving up the cough syrup but have only taken it once today. While I can tell I am not 100% yet I am way closer than I was a few days ago. Yay!

We had our family Christmas Party Saturday. It was fun to see everyone in a big pile but there are so many new short people that it gets a little noisy. We missed my eldest and the sister's girl, mate and 2 kids of having everyone there.

We all bring pot luck and keep it pretty basic so no one gets too flustered from having to feed that many. There were lots of yummy candies, cookies, and a birthday cake for the youngest grand girl along with a nice dinner. It's so hard to stay out of the treats. I did pretty well considering there was penuche, my personal demon, home made turtles with home made caramel over the nuts with chocolate on top, chocolate chip cookies, some kind of yummy layered cookies and a big bowl of mixed nuts to nibble on. Home jello jigglers and some other candy added color to the table. Not a good place to avoid eating...LOL!

The youngest grand is just one year this month. She's starting to have her own personality. Right now she is being a "mama's girl". I'll be glad when she's ready to bust out and hang with us. Gotta play with bubbles and such.

All of us seem to be doing fairly well. The kids all looked good and seemed fairly happy. The visit went well and I enjoyed it considering I had to mime or make someone come over to me where I could whisper to them. I have been looking forward to seeing some of our pals soon but if I can't talk I don't know how much fun it will be....I do have a whistle!

Now if I can just get enough energy to bake my own stuff this year I'll be doing well!

Bearing gifts we travel afar...

The gifts are going to have to do the traveling, I'm still down. I appreciate all the nice thoughts posted and emailed to me while I'm sick. Thank you. It does make a difference to know there are people that care that aren't your Mom!


So while I was all cranky and can't talk I made you all some gifts for being so nice. If you can't see the pictures please right click on the red x and select "Show Picture".

For one of my readers that took a photo for wallpaper - the real thing. Click on the photo, another window will open. Wait for the photo to download all the way, right click on it and select "Save Picture As". Then it's yours to use as wallpaper.




For the rest of my pals I made a calendar so you can mark out your vacations for the year on it and hang it where you can stare at it all day at work.

Click on the picture and when the next window loads all the way, right click on the big version and select print. Let me know if they give you any trouble. I hope you enjoy them.

There! I got my Christmas gifts for the blog pals done!

LOL!

Mama said there'd be days like this

When you are too zoned out on anti-histimines to concentrate, you haven't been resting well and you screw up every task. But you have to keep slogging through the quagmire that time has become to reach the end of the work day. Each second is an hour and your ache all over. You just want to get through the day so you can crawl home and collapse.

So I'll see ya later. I lost my voice anyway, I shouldn't be talking.

Dashing through the snow

Dashing through the snow
in our little four wheel drive.
Off to work we go,
hoping to arrive.

A plow comes rushing by,
smucking us with snow.
Oh what fun it is to cruise
down the backroads, here we go.

OOOOOHHH - Bless my mate,
I'm running late,
but he got me to town.
Then tonight, by sunsets light,
he'll take me safely home!

Welcome back to the winter wonderland! Just when I think I will get a snow day and get to stay home and nurse my cold my conscience attacks me. I would have driven myself but it seemed to be making the mate nervous so I let him take me to town in the little red truck. It was a fun ride. I am never sure if he is having too much fun driving through drifts or if he really thinks that Moi would slip the little white truck in a ditch. I lean toward the former.

Making first tracks and busting trail are things we both enjoy. The deeper the drift the larger the challange! And yes, it's only fun till you get stuck. But we don't need towing very often. Being raised in a rural area you get more chances to boondock and learn what you and your machine can do, and what you can't. We know our limits pretty well. If the rest of the drivers keep moving and stay out of our way we rarely need a rescue.

The Mate's Eldest called last night inviting him to an early morning breakfast. He was off at sevenish this a.m. to meet her. I got up at my usual time, had a look out the window, got a mug of coffee, made a mental note to fill the bird feeders tonight and sat down to drink my wake up cup. I stayed off line in case the mate needed backup.

When my voice kicked in I called the shop. I knew the boss would be there, he was. I just told him I was going to be late. We never see the plows till day two of a dust up like this. Then I got dressed and waited for the man to get home.

He had his little red truck all warmed up and his eyes were all twinkly with "I'm a drift buster" fun and he was willing to drive me to work. We loaded and rolled about 6 feet when his highness, the stupid cat came strolling up the tire tracks to be let into the house. .....darn cats! First he stays out two nights running in below zero weather and worries me sick, then he misses last call and makes me run back to let him in.....which I did.

We popped out the driveway and plowed on down the road. As we swished out onto our main road he started driving with one tire in the drifts... I just looked at him and he smiled big and said, "Just doing my part to keep the roads clear."

"You forgot to say, "for others", mate," I offered. "Doing your good deed for the day and all, ya know." Then we looked at each other and laughed!

He will be picking me up later today and we get to do it all over again to get home. From the forcast it looks like we will be snowed in in Tiny Town this weekend. What a drag....NOT!

Stay warm, all!

A spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down

The nasty medicine has to go down if I'm going to get any rest. I'm so stuffed up I can barely breathe, coughing till I can't breathe at all and then gasping till I am almost breathing again and then aching all over and my head hurts. I'm guessing bronchitis but it might be pneumonia or pluresy for all I know. Doesn't matter what you call it, I'm sick.

I pulled my beanie all the way down to the back of my neck and tied my scarf up to my nose then pulled my flannel lined coat over all of it and added my mitten before I even stepped out the door this morning and I was still cold. Then the sun had the balls to come out and look all cheerful and I had to dig out my rainbow mirror wrap around sunglasses. I wanted to stop at the store but figured they would think I was a robber so I blew it off.

I would have been poking at my computer if I was home so I went to work anyway. Having an office of only two people, I don't have to worry about spreading the germs around. We both have our own spaces. My germs can't get past the air filter so the boss should be safe enough if he just stays on his own side of the office.

I can never remember if it's feed a cold or starve a cold but I know I am drier than a desert rock at high noon. I am drinking lots of fluids just to keep my lips from sticking together because they are so chapped it hurts when they touch.

So I am all Happy happy joy joy here in the winter wonderland! Welcome to winter. I am requesting your cold cures and suggestions on how to feel better more quickly in the comments today. What's your favorite cold remedy? Does it really work or do you just not care you're sick after you take it? LOL!

Tell all the gang on 42nd Street

That I will soon be there...

I almost forgot and now I feel ashamed. And it's not that I believe that spreading the blame around will take away the sting of my failure, it's that I want to save you from making the same mistake I almost made.

It's the holiday season. Thanksgiving was well celebrated here. And I still forgot. Now I have started getting ready for Christmas. I have a cute little doll for one grand and a cute little outfit for the other grand, a girl gift for the family exchange and have been watching for something unique and special for the mate. I don't send cards if I send a gift and I don't send a gift if I send a card, just common sense to me - that and finances.

So I'm in the spirit, and thought I had things pretty well covered, for me. Then I got an email from the sis, actually from the OTHER sis, the one down south I don't see much. She said she wanted to try, one more time, to bake our family's secret receipe cookies for the holidays but needed the receipe again. I grabbed it out of the text file I had it in from the last time she asked for it and popped it in a reply and then finished reading her letter.

"....the daughter is going to stand by with the fire extinguisher so we should be all set. She will help ice them, too. Then we are going to send them to Iraq. Can you send me the address for you neice's unit?"

I was stunned. How come people forget so well? Is it a survival trait? The neice is still dealing with injuries and so many are still in the hospital. I had planned on a massive cookie bake myself for the weekend. I was going to give them to the kids and neices and such. Now they are all getting a photo of a plate of cookies and a card with the address of the wounded or active duty soldier I ship them to for Christmas.

Did you forget?

There ain't nothing like the real thing, Baby

Or maybe there is....











What do you expect from a woman dressed like the one on the left? Or from the man on the right? For me, the lady is a spy trying to lay low and the guy is goofy so I expect humor and fun. But the one is a sketch and the other a cartoon...why would I expect anything from 2D objects? Does my mind think they are real? Don't know. I know they are created objects, I still have expectations of them.

Brains are funny things. I don't even begin to understand how they work. And is a brain the same as a mind or is a mind what the brain processes produce? You never say, "There's something on my brain." or, "My mind hurts." Are they two things or one?

I do know that the mind can do funny things. I believe the brain can do way more than we use it for, too. My eldest got a migraine one afternoon when she was about 17. It was not a "get out of school free" headache, she had just gotten home, it was a crying, blinding pain in her head. I had nothing in the house for that kind of pain but I knew she had already taken the OTC stuff we had to no avail.

What to do? CRAP! Think! You're The MOM, you have to fix this! I thought. I had been the victim of a viscious toothache earlier in the month. ....hmmm. Those pills were gone, but the bottle wasn't. I told her to hang on a minute, ran to the bathroom and put a giant vitamin pill into the painkiller bottle, filled a glass with water and raced back to her.

"I have one left of the pain pills from the dentist. This is 100 mg. of ______, and it's very powerful stuff because I am resistant to medication. He based the dose on my weight. You are smaller than I am so I am going to give you half, which may be a little too much for your size. It should kick in pretty quickly, like fifteen minutes. If that doesn't work say, in an hour, you can have the other half." I had been spliting the pill with my pocket knife as I spoke and held out half of it to her.

She lifted her head and winced, snatched the pill, popped it in, took the water and washed it down. I made her a cold rag for her head and sent her back to her dark room to try and rest.

In an hour she was back up and doing homework while I finished making dinner. When she came out of her room I asked her how she felt. "I'm a little woosie from the pill, you know, like, lightheaded and floaty feeling, but it doesn't hurt anymore. That was good stuff!"

"I'm just glad it worked. I hate migranes. Let me know if it comes back and you can take the other half."

And I smiled as I cooked, thanking all the gods and goddesses for the kindness to my child. I had risked having to take Eldest to the doctor later if it hadn't worked but she always stressed out so easily that I was pretty sure that getting her to relax would fix her up. I never told her till years later what I had done. Then she didn't believe me.

Then today I found this article that says expectations can trigger physical healing. It made me wonder what else expectations can do. What do humans expect?

I have always expected my kids to behave in certain ways, to do things I did when I was, perhaps, too young to do them myself then, to be true to themselves and honest with people. I expected them to do chores and help with the house work when the mate and I both worked. Yes, and still do their homework! What a meanie I was!

Then I have watched other families where the 11 yr. old male was only allowed to make cold spread sandwiches and eat them with a glass of water because he wasn't allowed to use the stove or microwave, a knife to cut meat or the bread, or pour from a gallon jug. His parents didn't expect him to be able to do these things.

I have seen kids told they couldn't climb trees or ride bikes out of the yard. I have seen moms doing tons of wash in a home with teen agers because the kids were not allowed to use the washer and dryer......these parents didn't expect anything from their children and I think they got what they expected. Kids that didn't do anything for themselves and expected others to always be there to do it for them.

At least in the first case I know the boy grew up thinking he couldn't do anything complicated or dangerous. He believed he was too clumbsy and stupid. He got past that in time, but it took years to get the confidence in himself to try things, like driving a car, that most kids would have done years sooner.

If you are tall enough to reach the buttons you can run a washing machine or reach a sink to do dishes. When you can depress the brake on the mower you are ready to learn to ride it and mow. If you can reach the handle release on the vaccuume you are ready to clean carpets. When everyone works together to do chores they are done more quickly and that leaves more time to play cards, Nintendo, or watch TV as a family. All, of course, IMHO.

I feel that if you expect your kids to help and expect your kids to learn that they will feel if you believe it, it must be true, so they do help and they do learn. My kids were not allowed to call anyone stupid. We allowed ignorant and they knew what both words meant very young. Ignorance can be fixed by teaching and learning, so it wasn't a bad word. When kids said "Stupid!" they meant too dumb to learn and most kids really are NOT stupid - unless you have told them they are until the believe you.

I have also found that if you expect people to behave in a certain way, they will. I worked a lot of service jobs but I expect to be treated like a human being and with basic courtesy. Even my drunkest customers would say please and thank you and excuse me to me because I expected it. I just can't hear you if you are bellowing, "Hey baby! Bring me a beer!" rudely. New people learned fast because the regular customers would be laughing at them. One of them would take pity on the new guy and say, "Try - Excuse me, Val, may I have another draft?" It always made me smile. Two drinks or eight drinks drunk, my people were polite to me! I expected it.

So for the weekend - have you ever used a placebo yourself or for someone else? Did it work?
and what do you expect from your kids? Do you think your expectations for a relationship affect how it turns out or not?

Jump right in the comments and tell me what you think. I'll see you all on Monday!