Just to know that you remember me

Sometimes I have to remember who I am. I have been dealing with a situation I care about in a way that seems a little "overboard" sometimes. Then I remember that I AM a deeply caring person and overboard is my normal position. With or without a life ring or someone to throw me a line, I jump right in and try for whatever I think is important.

Sometimes I miss the boat, but I rarely have to say "Someone should do something about that", I usually have tried already. So I remind me that I am just fine, it's just the way I care. I care all the way.

I was looking up something for a friend and found this from last winter. Anvil's comment on the last post rang out - so I am running this again under, "Lessons learned from my dogs". Thanks, Anvil.
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I was praying for a dog tonight. At least I thought I was. He is a semi long haired, mostly white stray. He yips like a coyote though. I suppose he could be a coyote. It is under ten below zero here;. Wind chill makes it worse. I don't care what he is, it's too cold to be out without shelter and food.

I noticed him Tuesday as I walked my sis to the car. As he barked I made a comment and she answered, "It sounds like a dog freezing to death." I put dry food out front for him that night. I could see he ate some the next day, but not much. I have no hope of keeping water out there for him. It freezes in fifteen minutes. Solid.

Tonight, when I heard him again, I put out fresh food. Then, being the idiot I am, I went out to check it without looking first and scared him off it.

He stopped and sat under the street light's glow in the center of the intersection. I called and whistled. Whitey, Snowball, Snowflake, Smoke, Baby, Puppy - none of the words I spoke moved him to come to me. He got up and walked off into the dark.

He is so cold he can't stop moving long and he can't trust a human. When he thinks he might want to go to a human, even one with food in it's hand, he can't trust his own judgement. He remembers being wrong before and moves away. He is moving away from warmth, shelter, food and into the cold. It's all he knows to do that is safe from kicks and blows and loud words and anger. It's cold but it's safer alone in the dark.

All the dogs tied out alone tonight would lie together in a pile, if they were free, to keep warm. Straw, sheds, barns, none of them is enough shelter in this weather for an animal alone. The only way to survive is in a group of warm bodies or a place with heat.

I put my pads out from my summer chairs, one flat and one upright, blocking the wind, next to the pipe the furnace vents from. It's warm there, sort of. I put hot food in a bowl for him. I went back in, calling as I went.

I check from the windows, more careful now to be quiet. I see no tracks. I will have to go out and bring the food in to heat again soon. I put out chicken for him and dry food that won't freeze. Crap, it's in a steel bowl, I have to change it over to plastic.

Poor scared thing. Alone, cold, hungry, no trust, no hope except for a good trash can somewhere. I try to help but he is too afraid and so I do what I can and pray he finds a warm place to be tonight.
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I even care for stray dogs and a crying kitten would have me searching the yard. Of course I take care of people the same way and care for them even more!

Having been a stray myself, and sheltered some along the way, I have learned that sometimes you get bit. It doesn't stop me from trying to help where I think I can.

I like that about me. So what if it is a little overboard? I can swim!