You don't know what you've got till it's gone

In '88 we burned out. My kids have had the experience of going away for a weekend and coming home to almost nothing. I have stood in my socks next to the mate in his robe, jeans and boots, and watched the house go up in black, stinky smoke. We have had to wonder, "Now where will we sleep? Our food all burned up, what will we eat? What about the pets?", and it was after dark and cold out so throw in,"How will we get there?" No phone, it burned up and was before cells were common, so add."How do we call for help?"

If you really want to see what it is like then walk out to a grassy area, a park, the yard, where there is no one around and turn your back to the home. Now, pretend all you have is what your are wearing.

If you tried it you will find the first thing you do is start walking. It doesn't matter where, you just need to be moving. Your mind is going a mile a minute and you will head toward the nearest place you think someone can help you. A neighbors, the cop shop, the coffee shop where they might let you use the phone.

Now stop walking. Pretend, really hard, that these options are all gone, too. This will mess you up bad if you do it right. But you will still find yourself walking again soon. Why? Movement creates possibilities. Standing still does nothing.

Now picture all the people you thought would be able to help you walking all different directions than you are. They all have a different idea of which way to go to find the help they need. They are all in shock, not thinking well, some have lost loved ones forever, some have lost them till they find them again, some have pets, some don't but did, some are too young to know what to do and some are too old to do what they want to but they are all trying to move on, somehow.

Now get them all to stop. Then, with a bull horn, tell them that they have to have proof of ID, address, marriage certificates, kids birth certificates and SS numbers, ownership of houses, cars, credit card numbers, social security numbers, birth certificates, bank account numbers and the amount in the account, proof of insurance, health care account number and telephone number they can be reached at AND an address to receive mail at so you can send them some forms to fill out.

They have to supply this all before they qualify to get help. They left home without it. The banks you would ask to help you are gone, the house is gone, the car is gone, the court house where you would get copies of some of this is gone, the post office that could prove your address is gone. The DOT office where you get your drivers liscense is gone. The unemployment office is gone.

And if you can't prove it all in (five days for MI emergency assistance - with less than 4000.00 in EQUITY in anything, like a car for a family of 4) 45 days for FEMA, they CAN"T help you.

I can tell you, from experience, I had to have help filling out the paper work. I couldn't comprehend what I was reading, I couldn't remember the answers to birthdates without counting on my fingers. I was still in shock baut I didn't know it. They helped me get the 23 page questionaire filled out and then it took them five hours, while I sat and stared at the walls, to run it through the system far enough to tell me that because we had jobs and a car that didn't burn up we made too much money to qualify for emergency funds.

Even though we had just paid all the bills, bought all the groceries and then lost everything we had but the garage and had under 100.00 left in the bank. Unless we could prove we owed money on the car they couldn't help, we should sell the car. How were supposed to get to work then? They had no answer. NONE.

In five days I had to have my act together enough to figure out how to contact the loan company and get proof sent to the welfare people that we didn't own the car. I couldn't even remember if it was through GMAC or somewhere else and all the paperwork burned up. You really get that disconnected from life before a diaster and trying to pick up life after. It lasts from two weeks to months for some people.

I broke into a rage and told them that if this was their idea of how to lend some help to someone in a catastrophic situation that they could shove it. I could pick up pop bottles and get more help than I would with them. I thought they were there to help us and they were just there to document the fact that we burned out. There was no help.

The locals sent us to the Red Cross. If you don't call them in 48 hours it's not an emergency anymore. But the nice people there called the fire department, verified we were toast and gave us a voucher to the local stores for clothes for all of us and food plus some cash for gas money and personal care bags. I send my money to them. Screw the government. They are just looking for ways to say NO and save a dime.

I think of myself as a pretty sturdy person and have come through some amazing adventures without even cracking a sweat but this one did me in. About 6 weeks into the recovery I had to seek help from a professional and some happy pills. Six months later I was ok again. But not 5 days later. It was two weeks before I figured out the insurance company would know who the lien was made out to on the car. They might have suggested that - morons.

This is not a time for counting your change, Uncle Sam! It's time to see how much you can do without so that you can help others. When I say "Cut the red tape!" I mean that if you show up shocky that is enough to prove you were in it. Find the rest of their family, if there is any, give them housing, give them clothes, new is better, at least one outfit to call their own, get them medical treatment, whatever they need.

Go ahead and document it as much as you can using fingerprints and DNA samples to ID them, not paper work. Run a cost per person or per family and submit it to the correct agency if you must. But don't worry about HOW we will pay for it now! Or how they will pay it back. Just get them the help they need!

Yes, there WILL be abusers shamming the government and other emergency agencies. It will be a small percentage. The government loses more to Medicare over billing every day than cheats here will rack up. If you find out they lied then add it to their tax bill LATER.

If an old white trash biker lady can figure out you can track them by finger prints for proof of who they are, why can't the stupid government? All you should need is a thumb print and a signature on the damn papers. Sort the rest out later.

We were lucky, I ran to one neighbor while the mate ran to the other. We called the fire department, got help, coffee, borrowed clothes, smokes, used phones and went to stay, with the pets, with family that night. We were down, but we were moving on. And the mate saved my purse with check book and keys for the car and his wallet, we could prove who we were and get where we needed to go. But I couldn't do the damn paperwork that soon after I had sifted through the ashes to see if anything made it. My head was too confused to compute and my heart was too broken care.

You have a state and a half worth of people out there. They are suffering. They are unsure where their families are. They had to leave everything they know and love and hate and see everyday. They are all in different stages of shock. But they are TRYING to MOVE ON!

Help them. Please.